and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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