Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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