Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Randomize
