I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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