Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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