wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
