Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
