Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
