I think i peed on brittanys purse
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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