Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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