Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I FOUND THE LEGS
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
