im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Randomize
