We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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