Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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