whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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