How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
