if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
