She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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