Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Randomize
