We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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