Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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