Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
