come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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