remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
