You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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