Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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