quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
