weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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