Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
