My friends, they love my intelligence
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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