marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
foreskin is a definite game changer
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
3 2 1 whiskey
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
