I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Randomize