You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
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