There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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