I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
