Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
