So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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