the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
