I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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