his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
