I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion