I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
