It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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