No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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