That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
