How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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