I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
