He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
