She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
