The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Do vagina's smell?
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Randomize
