Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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